One time someone told me that I had a sallow skin tone, and I was actually self conscious about it for a while because of the comment. If you don't know, sallow means a sickly yellow color; It's not used for flattery. It was 3 years later when I found out that my skin tone was actual neutral, and that meant that I could get away with a wider array of colors. I just felt like going back in time and replying to her comment, "No my skin tone is neutral and it's beautiful."
What I'm trying to say is, Know that what negative things people are saying about you most likely aren't true. There's a lot of things I've been told about my appearance that were really hurtful over the years, and I'm coming to find out that they aren't even remotely true and/or were just said with the intention of hurting me.
People need to start paying closer attention to what they say and how they treat people. Ideally you shouldn't care about what people say about you, but not all of us have reached that ability. Also, ideally no one should feel the need to say hurtful things about others' appearances.
It breaks my heart that people, led by their own insecurities and shortcomings, can be as mean as they are. No one likes being insulted and treated poorly, no one. So why do people do it? Especially about appearances. You would have to be pretty dense to believe that someone's appearance dictates anything. You would have to be dense and shallow to not come up with anything intelligible to say and so you choose appearance to criticize. It's not going to make you feel better or change your life for the better. Treating someone poorly and noting a physical "flaw" of theirs is not going to magically better your insecurities or enrich your life.
My roommate last semester and her friends would sit around and talk about nothing else besides other females' appearances. As if these human beings had nothing else going for them besides their looks. As if the only purpose in life is to be attractive and be seen as attractive. Eventually I would put on headphones every time she had company so I wouldn't have to be surrounded by constant negativity towards something so petty as looks.
It's so easy to displace your own issues onto other people instead of trying to fix them yourself. Everyone has weaknesses they are dealing with and don't need other people making them worse with negative comments about them. Everyone has beauty in them. It's not hard to find it.
Start trying to focus on positive things that you like about a person/their appearance/what they're wearing and genuinely complement at least one person a day. If people you hang around constantly rag on other people and their appearances, maybe you should reconsider who you are surrounding yourself with or try and change the discussion to a more positive subject. You'll start noticing yourself feeling better and more positive as well as other people. It's a win-win.
Sorry for the heavy text, I'm just fed up with this negative body image nonsense. That's exactly what it is, nonsense. On a lighter note, here's a picture of Tiger trying to get some early morning lovins and my outfit I wore the other day.
Shirt:Forever21
Skirt:Vintage
Shoes:Thrift
Shoes:Thrift
My friend Dillon told me this outfit reminded him of The Sound of Music, haha. I absolutely love that movie/musical so it was definitely the right kind of complement for me. Oh, and if you're wondering why I'm wearing a warmer weather outfit, it's been in the 70's the past 3 days! Goodness me, I need to remember to go get a haircut before I get back to Murfreesboro. I'm looking kind of shaggy and my hair isn't looking as lustrous as I'd like. I hope everyone is having a great weekend though!
Till next time,
Jess
